I'm a Dreamer...

Yep, I'm a dreamer. I've always had pretty intense and vivid dreams. As far back as I can remember, I can remember dreaming. (Remind me to tell you my orange soda dream one day).

Last night was no exception. And I remember them fairly clearly. Maybe because I slept so poorly due to allergies and an eye infection and a thunderstorm.

But sleeping poorly isn't really the point, the point is that my dreams were weird. And to prove just how weird I dream, I will tell you the two most vivid dreams I remember from last night.

Dream 1:

I was hanging out with friends. Not weird because I'm always hanging out with friends. Except that we were hanging out in a ginormous tree house. The house was actually inside of the tree and had multiple rooms. So there we are hanging out and singing karaoke (because why wouldn't I be singing karaoke inside of a tree??). Then one of my friends suddenly gets down on one knee and proposes to me. And I say yes and put on this gorgeous huge yellow diamond ring. When I woke up, I sitll felt like I had that huge rock on my finger. And ya know what else-as soon as I had that ring on my finger, I realized I loved this guy.

Too bad in real life he is already married. We might have had a future there somewhere :)

So I'm in love and have a huge beautiful ring. Nice dream. Now on to...

Dream 2:

I walk into a house. A super nice house with a lovely dining room table all decorated for some kind of party. And I realize the party is for me. Yeah! I look around and realize that all of my friends and family are there. Yeah again! We sit down to this beautiful dinner and we are all eating and talking and having a lovely time. I go into the kitchen with my aunt to refill drinks for everyone when I turn to her and tell her that I am dying. And that toinght is my last night. She starts crying, I start crying. People hear us and wander into the kitchen. I announce to everyone that I won't be around much longer and suddenly I am angry and scared and sad.

Apparently my friends and family were a little scared of this announcement so they all left. Except for 2 lovely friends who decided they better stay with me in my last few hours. One of my friends tries to give me some sleeping pills to help me calm down and drift uneventfully into the next life. Except the pills appear to have the opposite effect and I'm wide awake and even more scared. The dream ends with me taking my last few breaths.

Now I just need someone to tell me what these dreams mean...

These are a few of my favorite things...

Just to remind me that there is plenty to be thankful for...


My cute nephew Osborne who just had his first birthday.


Spring...and spring flowers!


Happy memories of Hawaii.


The beautiful country that I live in.


Friends who keep me grounded.


A reminder that there is a plan for me and someone who is making sure that plan will unfold how and when it is supposed to.

When a ? looms larger than an !

I've been stressed lately. My doctor will surely not be happy that my stress hormones have peaked once again.

But it can't be helped.

Because I may or may not have received a letter saying that the funding for elementary counselors has been cut.

Good ole budget cuts.

So now I need to decide what to do with my life. Which I would have to say is one of the most stressful things in the world.

I can go anywhere, do anything, whatever I choose to do. The only problem is that with a million different opportunities, things tend to just get more stressful to me.

Because I want to make sure I'm in the right place at the right time. That I'm exactly where I need to be.

And while lots of people think I'm crazy for saying this-most the time I feel like right here-in the middle of nowhere-is where I need to be.

So do I wait around and hope a job becomes available (which people higher up than me seem to think is a good possibility) or do I bite the bullet and move somewhere new, try something else?

I keep trying to get someone to tell me what to do but no one will...but I'll ask one more time for good measure. What should I be doing?

Sorry I've been m.i.a. for awhile.

Could be because I spent some time here...


St. George, UT temple

And here...


Las Vegas, NV temple

Also here...


Relands, CA temple

Plus a little jaunt here...


Los Angeles, CA temple

Another stop here...


Newport Beach, CA temple

And one last stop here...



San Diego, CA temple

My friends and I may have spent spring break on a little southern Utah/Vegas/southern California temple tour.

I may just try to post some picture of us actually there. But I'm not making any promises.

If I had to vote...

I may or may not constantly be trying to convince my cousins that I am their favorite.

And if we had a family council and a vote for favorite cousin came up, I like to think that I'd come out victorious.

I'll try to poll the cousins at our next family reunion and let you know how I do.

Where I've been

"A new experience can be extremely pleasurable, or extremely irritating, or somewhere in between, and you never know until you try it out."
— Lemony Snicket



When I was about 15, I remember being at church and talking with the other girls about when we would get married and have children. I think we even wrote down our guesses so we could look back one day and see how close we were.

I'm pretty sure that everyone thought I would be married when I was 21. And when I was 21, I'm positive that I thought I would be married by the time I was 25 and when I was 25, I was sure I would be married by the time I turned 29. And here I am, 2 months away from turning 29 and my life is nowhere close to where I had imagined it would be.

Am I disappointed that my life is so different than my 15 year old self imagined it? Sometimes. Am I scared that my life might never turn out the way I want it to? Yep. But would I take back any of the experiences that I've had in the past 14 years? Absolutely not.

If I would have been married at 21 (or even at 25 for that matter), I probably would have never gone to grad school, or vacationed in Hawaii, or traveled the US so extensively, or moved to Blanding, or met the amazing people I have. I would have missed out on so many things that have made me who I am.

Three years ago, I would have never dreamed that I would be living in small town Utah, working on the Indian reservation. But I will always remember the feeling that I got as I drove from Salt Lake to Mexican Hat. The feeling that I was home.

That maybe for the first time in my life, I was exactly where I was supposed to be when I was supposed to be there.

So while my life might be different than I planned, I'm grateful to know that the plan for my life is still right on track.